Little Elkan’s 1st Spread

November 25, 2006 Leave a comment

 
It is not very difficult to describe the "proudness and happiness" that I am feeling right now. I am superbly surprised, excited, overwhelmed, proud and delighted. It is my little boy’s 1st magazine spread, his own private token of being a public stock photo for the number 1 parenthood magazine in Singapore. (Guess he doesn’t feel the same excitement shit as I do cos’ he is not polluted by the imaginary fame of mass media). But this is exactly how I felt when Feli flashed the magazine over MSN last night… I was completely overwhelmed! It was a sweet surprise.
 
Nothing pricey about the material – $5-mag, A4 size, 85gsm art paper, 4C x 4C. However, it is a beautiful picture of my little prince. A moment in time, a lovely capture of his innocence and joy. Now, that is priceless. I just can’t stop staring at it for the past 1 hour. Strange, isn’t it? My son is my biggest idol now. He has more "studio explosure" than his big fat ugly papa Joe. And he attracted more girls and kisses too. (Sigh)
 
Boy, my little boy is so lucky – thanks to our network of designer friends. Elkan started his "stock images" days while he was still floating in his mummy’s womb. A local magazine used his "ultra-sound scan" image for an article. And before he turned 1, he appeared in one of Singapore Sports Council booklets (thanks to Wendy and Stephen). Last Christmas, Elkan was on an e-Greeting card for National Volunteer & Philanthropy Center (thanks to Richard). And this month, he is featured on Young Parents magazine (thanks to Cheryl and Tracy). Elkan has quite a humble collection of media clippings, I must say.
 
Nonetheless, we aren’t stardom-hungry parents. Like any typical father, I love to see my son glows in his own way. My boy, this is certainly the best gift you gave us yesterday – which coincide with our 13th Anniversary on 24th Nov.
 
It is certainly a beautiful picture and a perfect headline – "all I want for Christmas"…is you – my boy – with me in Shanghai this Christmas.
 
Also, find Elkan on other Blogs:
 
 

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Happy Birthday 2 You, Son.

October 17, 2006 1 Comment

 
Dear son,
 
My little prankster, I dun know when will you get the chance 2 read this. Perhaps, your mum can read this blog 2 you at bedtime.
 
Guess what, you are 2 2day! This means we have been 2gether for exactly 2 years! Mmm…not exactly 2 years in terms of time spent…(if you minus away all the weekdays, my stay in Shanghai and your little trips 2 Malacca.) I was a little fearful that you have forgotton about me when I have 2 be away in Shanghai for so long. It seems that the "Joe Standee" at your house works! Just remember that "Daddy" is not my name or the name of that standee…it is more like an affection title between us both. 
 
I am so proud of you, my son. You are the product of 2 really creative lovers who got together because of a mahjong game. And I heard from mum that you are becoming a monster lately… Okay, apparently, the adults are expecting you 2 behave like them. I know it is hard 2 understand "baby commands" like "mummum" (eating), "bongbong" (bathing), "sheshe" (peeing) and "ooiooi" (sleeping). 2 be honest, I am bored 2…I did thought of teaching you more cool words like "bigbig kalinda", "cheeky meijie", "fatty gareth", "bamboo juliana", "clumsy tracy" and "angry joanne" etc. I am sure you attract more kisses, laughters and hugs if you can master them.
 
Oh yes, for your own good… please go and master "sexy mummy" first… She will play more "purple dino" for you 2 watch.
 
Strangely, my son… you are so small yet you have such a strong influence over the adults. Over time, these "aunties and uncles" have picked up your little body language and sounds. You are a natural magnet but a soft-hearted one. Seeing you reminded me of my past as a child. It is a rediscovery for me…bringing me back 2 my roots…remembering how I was back then.
 
Son, you are ever so friendly, adorable, cute and polite 2 new faces…yet…like you dad and grandfather, you prank on your closest ones. Some thing can’t change. You will grow up being a soft-hearted person who loves your family and loved ones more than you care about yourself. This is you, our legacy.
 
Sorry for not bidding farewell during my last home trip. You know, it is so hard 2 say goodbye 2 you. Your tears, your calling of "daddies" just break my heart. Perhaps, you will never know… I miss you so much…and enjoyed so much whenever I am with you. Your mum says I need not 2 take care of your pampers and feeding. I guess that must be the reason. (You are certainly getting 2 heavy and difficult 2 maintain now… Granny and mum are complaining about their health… You kinda drove them up the walls all day, huh?)
 
Boy, you are just so lucky… Look at you 2day… The center of attraction! You just had all my favourite girls surrounded you! Man, daddy is jealous…wish I can be in your spot 2. Get out of those girls company and spend more macho time with the uncles. People on the street are still calling you "mui mui". Man, I wish I knock some sense into their head – YOU ARE ALREADY 2 AND THEY STILL THINK YOU ARE A GIRL???
 
Oh yes, I must complained on your behalf.. These nice aunties brought you 2 Crystal Jade for dinner and you are served nothing but boring blend congee for your birthday dinner?????? Urghh… if daddy is there, I would have treated you a nice mud pie or roasted chicken. I hope the guests have the same congee like yours 2.
 
And son, you screwed up the gift opportunity. Heard that you are given the freedom 2 pick any gift at Toys R Us 2day… (it was my wish since young!)…and you ended up picking nothing for yourself???? Didn’t you see Xbox 360 or PSP Games? What were you thinking??? Chasing the air again? You know…such offer doesn’t come back again.
 
Okay, my prince. Me got 2 go. Enjoy the monkey I gave you… (dun let mum or granny took it away). And dun you dare be the monkey 2. You already have the Harry Porter’s scar on your forehead this June. Just stop there…you aren’t wolverine.
 
Happy birthday 2 you. That is the only time you can really put a real "2" in that.
 
Love,
 
Elkan Daddy, Shanghai
17th Oct 2006, Tuesday
 

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Elkan’s 1st Surgery (20th Sept)

September 23, 2006 Leave a comment

 
Blog by: Bobo
 
The day started early at 4.30am where ELkan gets his last milk feed before
surgery. A sip of water before 7.30am and by 9.30am, we arrived at the
hospital.
 
There were quite a number of kids at the waiting room. Elkan was reluctant
to change into the surgery gown, struggled a lot. He wouldn’t let the doc
touch him too. He was very afraid that his granny and me will leave him
alone. Kept hugging our legs. Just like what he did when we brought him to
the childcare.
 
After 5ml of sleepy syrup, he started smiling and swinging his head. He was
mumbling "star star.. star star" After 10 min, he was giving the gas mask
(strawberry flavored) and 2 mins later he was sound asleep.
zzzzzzZZZZZZZZz… …
 
The surgery took an hour. He slept for another 2 hours after that. Had some
milk when he woke up and was ready to walk around slowly. After he was able
to pass urine and walk on his own. He was discharged!
 
On the way home, he vomited on the cab… again. Guess he was still weak and
stomach couldn’t hold the food well. Once he was home, he was happy to with
his bear bear again!

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Elkan 1st Day in School

September 16, 2006 Leave a comment

 
Blog by Bobo:
 
(Tuesday, 12th Sept 2006)
Today’s a happy day for Elkan (so far lah). Brought him to school. He was a
little reluctant to step in until I make the first move, then he followed.
He smiled brightly most of the time. Other parents’ first impression was:
"Wah…. what a handsome boy!"

Very quickly, he settled down on the floor and played blocks with other boys
his age. Most of them can say their own names. And they are very friendly to
him. They offer him their toys and keep saying hello to him.

He waved his hands to asked me to sit beside him to play but I told him to
play with other boys. And he did. Then I told him: "Mummy going to work, ok?
You kiss mummy can?" He gave me a quick kiss, waved bye bye and went back to
his friends! Guess he was eager to play with them lah.

So I left him with mum. She’ll sit around for a while then go market after
he had his first meal there (breakfast). Think he should be fine lah.
Heee… Enjoy the pixs!

 

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A Black Day

August 29, 2006 Leave a comment

Exactly one day after the arrival of “Grey”, my life went into a few days of “Black”.
In fact, this happened about 1 week ago – last Wednesday to be exact. I was having a late meeting (here in Shanghai) when I received a call from Felicia. It was 730pm. She was sobbing over at the other end.
That was the 2nd time I heard Feli crying over at the other end. Living overseas, there is no such thing as “a good place” or “a good timing” for someone to break a bad news. The 1st time when Felicia called crying was when Elkan hit and cut his head. My heart sank when I heard the news but I regained my senses almost immediately – to mentally-prepare for the next step. Thankfully, it was just a couple of stitches and my little boy was hopping about the next day.

“Dear…there has been an accident…” Felicia cried. “…..A car accident…”

My heart broke even before I get to hear the complete story. In that spilt second, everything paused around me. I looked outside the window… lots of images flashed across my mind – like a sudden power surge – I saw images of my mother, my father, my friends and my son. It was the “scariest and longest second” I ever felt in my life. Yes, I am preparing for the worst.
“What happend…?” I asked.
“Dear…you know, this morning, they left for Malacca… something happened…one of the cars overturned….and one of our auntie died on the spot, “ she sobbed.
That was all I could take. My heart sank…and my knees turned weak. I walked out of the conference room, found a quiet corner and sat there. Earlier that day, 2 Singapore cars left for Malacca. My mother-in-law and Elkan were in one of the cars. For that one moment, my mind told me that I have already lost my son. My head was blank…My heart stopped beating… nothing else matters now.
“Is… Elkan…alright?” I trembled. I was expecting for the worst. My head was already calculating all the exit plans – air ticket, project hand-over, etc etc.

“Yah..he is okay…Mum and him were in the other car…” Felicia assured me. It was a relief and that is all I need to hear.

I couldn’t sleep that night. Feeling so lost, sad and worried. My heart went to my cousins and uncle – who lost a lovely mother and wife overnight. I can understand their loss, their pain. This could happened to my son or anyone dear to me.
Life is so ironic. I experience both the extreme joy (of birth) and sorrow (of death) in less than 24 hours. Life is so fragile – as what Joanne said to me – we may not even have a chance to say goodbye.
For my late auntie and her family who loves her. My deepest condolences.

Filed under Family, Life in Shanghai, Life in Singapore

The Day I Fell in Love with my son

February 5, 2006 1 Comment

It is really hard to explain that mysterious fatherhood experience.
 
Saying “I love you” to my son is easy cos’ that is the most appropriate thing to express. Do I love my son? Yes – because he is my flesh and blood. And he is the love-product of me and Felicia. Is it real or just a cliché way of expression, I dun know. Or is it  because “We are blood-related so we must love one another”?
 
The truth is: I am excited and happy about this new member of my family. I am happy every time I see him. I think about him all the time. I am always keeping a look-out for his gifts. Is this love? I think so. But it is not the same kind of feelings I felt for my wife – that “butterfly feeling”.
 
Love must be nurtured over time. Love cannot be defined by titles, status, deity or even bloodline. When you felt pampered and needed, you feel love knocking on your door. Love is colorless, odorless and invisible. Love exists because we believe in it. Love exists because we feel it. We felt love because it is pure, mutual, unconditioned and well-received.
 
I was looking at my 15-month son the other day. He can’t speak yet; he has just started walking and is trying to explore every new object around him. I was wondering if my son loves me. How would someone of his age is able to express love – when he can’t even conduct the basic verbal communication?
 
Somehow, this Chinese New Year holidays changed all that.
 
Playing football with Elkan 
On Chinese New Year eve, I was playing football with Elkan in our house. It is a simple game. I dribbled the ball and he was chasing after it. Somehow, I slipped on his toy and took a very nasty fall. I hit the floor with a bang and bruised my elbow. I was murmuring in pain.
 
What happened in the next few seconds was totally unexpected. Elkan stood there and looked at me with a very worried face. Then he started crying and walked over to hug me. I was surprised. He knew I was hurt and he offered me a hug. I was touched by this little pure gesture. I was puzzled by his pure affection and reaction to my fall.
 
Elkan having high fever
The next day, something bad happened. This time, it was Elkan. He caught a very bad fever bug. It happened on the 1st day of Chinese New Year. Elkan had a high fever – 39.8 degrees. There was no sign, no hint and nothing indicative about his sudden bout of illness.
 
At that moment, a new feeling came into me. For that spilt second, I thought I am going to lose Elkan. I am so worried about him. My heart was crying and aching (like a rejected relationship) and I was desperate. Both Felicia and I couldn’t sleep over the next 2 nights. We took turns to sponge him and fed him with medicine.
 
Eventually, Elkan got well on the 3rd day of Chinese New Year. All these while, I have to tuck him to sleep. Elkan, on the other hand, would only extend his arms to me – signally me to carry him. He wouldn’t allow anyone (including my mum or sister) to carry him. Whenever I am just a couple of steps away from him, he would cry in tears, stretching his hands for me. Once he is in my arms, he would “tuck” himself comfortably within my grips and hugged me tightly. Many times, seconds before he dozed off, he would look at me and smile. That closeness we shared is indescribable.
 
On the 4th Day of Chinese New Year, I was leaving for KL. That morning, I went over to his bed, looked at his sleeping figure and gave him a little peck on his cheek.
 
That morning, I whispered that same 3 cliché words to him. Only this time, the feeling is real (Yes, I found back that butterfly). For once, I am lovesick with my son.
 

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Roving Clouds, Shooting Stars and Fireworks

November 2, 2005 1 Comment

The sky above us often displays the most spectacular emotions. In a clear breezy day, you could see cottons of roving clouds, forming shapes that are only limited by your little imagination. At night, you see millions of twinkling stars spread across the dark galaxy, dazzling across the dark mysterious sky.

Singaporeans are too busy to admire the enchanting sky. We are often surrounded by clusters of skyscrapers and urban canopy that blocked our sight of the horizon. While the trees and shaded walk-ways protect us from the harsh tropic sun and rain, it also cluttered our vision of the beautiful sky.

I guess the only time you find Singaporeans look up, gazing at the sky is either during a “well publicized” lunar eclipse, planet alignment, festive seasons or on 9th August – when the local will gathered in thousands near Esplanade at Marina Bay to watch those dazzling fireworks.

I have never given a damn thing about the “sky-gazing” – not until my first visit to Australia. For some reasons, every photograph (outdoor) turned out superbly well – without the aid of a colour-enhancement filter. The Aussie has the greenest fields, bluest sky and reddest sunset. 

Winter Night, Year 1999 – During our first farm-stay at Bunbury, after dinner, Felicia and I sat decided to take a night stroll along the pond – just 5-min walk from our chalet. That night, we were both greeted with the most enchanting night sky.  In that perfect dark setting, we stood there (under 8 degrees), counting shooting stars and roving clouds. There was no street-lamp or exposed lightings to deter our vision for the clear “starry starry night”. It was an unforgettable sight.

Last night, both Felicia and I watched a marvelous display of fireworks just outside our windows at Eunos. No, it wasn’t the Deepavali fireworks. Neither has it got anything to do with the Hari Raya celebration. It was simply a gift from Mother Nature.

Streams of lightning flashed actively across the dark red sky. Strangely, it wasn’t thunderous. On the contrary, it gave us a very soothing and peaceful mood. Switching off all the lights in our house, we rolled up our window blinds, stood by our windows, gawking at nature’s most spectacular fireworks. (See photos).

For that few minutes, my fear for lightning has been replaced by a sentiment of love. Hypnotically and electrifying, it was indeed a very beautiful and breath-taking performance.

Filed under Cool Stuffs, Family, Jo's Thoughts, Life in Singapore

The night when I rejected Elkan twice.

October 28, 2005 Leave a comment

There are many goodbyes in life. Some was routine, some was temporary and some was for good.

Last night, I had my first heart-breaking goodbye with Elkan.

 
I was clearing some toys from Eunos and bringing it over to Tampines for Elkan. It was supposed to be a "drop-&-go" affair as I had a dinner appointment later. Elkan was playing in my mother-in-law room when he heard me at the gate. He crawled out and start crawling in my direction – really excited and happy. I picked him up and hugged him for a while – he was so happy and smiling.
 
As I have a cab waiting for me downstairs, I told my mother-in-law to hold Elkan back. Elkan was put down and standing by the closed gate, stretching his hands out and calling me. I said gently to him: "Elkan, go back, daddy got to go. Tomorrow pick you up, ok?"
 
Unlike all our previous goodbye-session, Elkan displayed a very emotional feat last night. Elkan often cried when Chups or Stella went out to work. But last night was different…
 
He kept calling out and stretched his hand out for me. I was standing at the lift-lobby, waving bye to him. For the next 10 seconds, Elkan started screaming (still with his hand stretched out). My mother-in-law started to carry him. I then said "no-no" and was backing my steps away from him. When Elkan knew I wasn’t going to be there for him anymore, he started panting loudly in anger, gave me a very painful stare and turned his head away from me. Both my mother-in-law and myself were so shocked! Elkan has never displayed such unhappiness in front of us. He showed so much rejection and anger for once.
 
When my lift door opened, there was a "ding" sound. Elkan immediately recognised that as the lift door. He quickly turned his head around and took a small peek at me. I stood there, smiling and saying bye. He tried again – this time, softly calling me and stretching out his hand, with a little smile. I still said "no" and shook my head. Just when I was about to walk into the lift, he burst out in tears. I came out of the lift and said "bye". Like the first rejection, he felt betrayed by my absence of attention. Elkan stared at me in tears and turned his head away, sobbing in my mother-in-law’s arms.
 
Feeling pain and sadness…I came out of the lift and walked to the gate, coaxing him. My mother-in-law (who was holding him all this while), tried to turn Elkan to face me. Elkan was so hurt, he refused to face me, no matter how we tried turning his head to face me. He continued to sob sadly…
 
Feeling so sad to leave my son behind, smiling at my mother-in-law, I left Tampines with a very heavy heart.
 
p/s (Tonight, I will bring Elkan back for the weekend stay)
 
 

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52 Weeks with Elkan

October 23, 2005 Leave a comment



"When a child is born, a father is born."

Juliana gave me a book on fatherhood around the time when Felicia is going to deliver Elkan. Somehow, this copy left me a very deep impression about parenthood.            

Parenthood has certainly changed our lives in a great way. Before, I could never tell the big difference between our courtship days and our marriage life. There were still the same lovely weekend movies, regular fine-dining and annually holiday trip.

Somehow, all these changed when Elkan is born. There is no more weekend movies at the cinema – now we spend our weekend playing xbox games. Fine-dining has become a luxurious weekday affair when Elkan is not around. And overnight, all my wahbiang buddies became weekend nannies for my Elkan. Financially, there is also a big impact on our monthly spendings. We are keeping a huge part of our wages for this little monkey of ours. And soon, I have to start looking for a bigger unit to house our child. The current “studio apartment” is running out space fast. Where is the “zen element” that we were looking into when we first renovated this house? The list of changes can go on and on…       

Ambrose, Travis, Ethan or Elkan?

Naming my son could be the most difficult “branding project” I ever engaged. In fact, both Felicia and myself have been spending a lot of our time browsing thru hundred of baby names at MPH months before our son is born. Somehow, the name “Ambrose” has been ringing in my mind 3 months before the full-term of my son. First, I tot it is unique and it sure sound manly. But this name has been “violently objected” by almost 90% of my friends and family. For once in my life, I took their advise and picked another name.      

Eventually, the name “Elkan” is conceived (from internet) 12 hours before our son is born. “Elkan” is a hebrew name – meaning “belonging to God”. I have always put my faith and belief in Christianity but was too lazy to go church on Sundays. I hope my son would find his own connection with God one day.   

52 Weeks with Elkan

I would really love to title this booklet “365 days with Elkan”. The truth is we have only spent 52 precious weekends + 10 public holidays + 10 “mother-in-law on leaves” days with our son. That is why every weekend, I would try to snap as many photographs of Elkan – so that I can observe his growth and changes the next week we picked him up from my in-law.

Learning from Elkan

Believe it or not – The smallest being on earth has the largest influence on us. Wendy would agree with me. Stephen, Felicia and even Meijie are mimicking Elkan’s baby language. He certainly has powerful “communication influence” over these adults. 

Elkan may be just a baby but I am learning so much new things from him every weekend. Observing how Elkan starting to walk, how he got down the bed and the way he is trying to communicate are simply AMAZING. From what I have learnt over these 52 weekends, I made one discovery – A baby’s brain may be operating 10 times faster than us. Elkan has superb eye-sight, reaction speed and memory. It is a joy just to watch and observe his reactions time over time. Perhaps, it is time to teach him how to play my xbox.       

Doting Nannies

Just want to thank all of you for doting our little Elkan. Especially to these weekly full-time nannies – Stephen, Wendy, Joanne, Tracy, Kalinda, Juliana, Duuk and Meijie. Thanks to “Spell”, Elkan has achieved his first 11K publication appearance even before he turned 1. For Juliana and Stephen, thanks for all the nice clothings and toys that you have bought for our Elkan over the past 52 weekends. And yes, Kalinda, we can’t wait to spin your “merry-go-round” and see the completion of your banner “Elkan – My First Year”. Joanne and Tracy, thanks for helping up, covering my duties at work and watching over Elkan – be it at Caffeine or Hotel 25. For Duuk and Meijie, I know it may be bored for you guys. But really appreciate your presence at my hotel every Sat for our regular sessions of xbox.

Last but no least, a BIG THANK YOU to my mother-in-law, Chup and Stella for spending your days with Elkan. And huggies for my papa and mama, Auntie Amy and Sister Jovel who loves Elkan so much. And yes, BIG BIG LOVE for my dear Bobo who has lost so much energy taking care of 2 babies at Hotel 25. (Hint: any holiday trip soon?)           

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Elkan Unwrapped Presents!

October 23, 2005 Leave a comment

Elkan Unwrapped Presents – Last night, Elkan had his first honor to unwrap his 1st birthday gifts in front of all his doting uncles and aunties. Gosh, my entire living room is filled with Elkan’s item now!

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